Oscarfied

Last night was a Hollywood first for me. Through my wife's work, I was able to attend the 2011 Academy Awards. Actually, I didn't attend; I was in the press room.  And I didn't just sit around and watch, I had to work.

Tiffany was asked to work the Oscars again this year (she's done it twice before).  Basically the job is to hand out radios for the press as well as pass around microphones for a few of them to ask the winners questions.

Basically we were stuck in this ballroom adjacent to the Kodak Theater for ten hours.  We had a great view of the members of the press.  The winners would come in periodically during the show and we would scramble around to get the microphones to the press people that were given a chance to ask the winners a question.  And yes, there were several stupid questions.

Tiffany and I against a non-copy-written image

(seriously, we couldn't take pictures in the press room)

 Believe it or not, this is the first time I've ever worn a tux.

It's not all that fun.

 The food - my one and only payment for working (Tiffany was paid)

It was a pretty crazy night.  Nothing too amazing happened, just a lot of hurried madness.

A few really fun things did happened:

• When the press were asking Melissa Leo questions I had to walk in front of her (like two feet away) and crouch down awkwardly.  I didn't mind - she's still got it!
• Christian Bale was openly candid with the press - much more than I had expected.  The best jokes of the evening came from his self-deprecating humor.
• One press woman asked Natalie Portman why she wasn't wearing Dior (apparently she's the face for that designer), then also asked about the designer that made anti-semitic remarks.  The moderator avoided this by interrupting "we're going to move on to the next question."
• I saw Trent Reznor.  Seriously guys - Trent Reznor!!
• Everyone of the winners looked exactly like they do on the screen.  Some of them were smaller and shorter than I thought (except the Australian bloke who won best animated short, he is truly that short.)
• The food was seriously awesome.   Well worth the free labor.
• Being that close to the winners made me feel extremely excited to meet and talk with them, but of course there's no chance I could do that in the venue and situation I was in.  It also really made me want to try harder to make it there some day as a guest and possibly nominee.  This is why I do what I do!  To dress up in funny clothes and pat myself and others on the back.  It's about recognition of your talents and abilities.  It's about getting to know others who share your love and enthusiasm for the business of making movies.  It's about partying and having a good time because you worked hard all year.

Would I do it again?  Probably not unless Tiffany wanted me to.  I would however take an invite to the show in a heartbeat (nudge nudge).

Read More

Welcome Stranger

I have a pile of scripts to read on my desk, I am in the middle of finishing a new pilot and I have a few favors that I need to be doing for friends.  But I can't think straight right now, so I need to just write it out and see if I feel better.

Last night was a new experience for my burgeoning career in Hollywood.  I was a welcomed stranger in a strange land.

As some of you may know, a large part of my career of choice is networking.  To be able to shmooz and talk and get to know other people is the main way you get jobs, sell projects and make money.  (I'm totally down with this principle by the way, it is a necessary thing).

For a change of pace, I was invited to a mixer for Entertainment professionals of Asian and Pacific descent.  "But" you say, "you're not Asian, Eric."  Ya, I know.  It's cool, I was with good people.

It was a strange experience to say the least.  Not that I was shunned for being white, but because I was not shunned.  Let me explain...

Shunning can be very passive-aggressive.  It is very easy to ignore a person because of who they are, what they are and what they look like.  To ignore a person standing in the room that you for some reason hate with all of your black heart, is a very easy thing to do.

I'm not saying this is a good thing, it's actually quite bad.  But sometimes you just don't get along with someone or sometimes a person has done something offensive to you or your kin.  I think we all do it subconsciously to certain types of people.  I know I am guilty of doing this, and I hate to admit that I'll probably do it again.  Especially if I ever get stuck in a room with someone I secretly dislike (you probably don't know who you are, but I assure you - I don't like you.)

But here's my point - while attending this wonderfully asian social soirée, I was not shunned but welcomed whole-heartedly.  Almost too much in fact.  I felt completely at ease while there, even though there were a few moments of pure awkwardness - mainly from having been approached by one of the other only white guys there and being asked incessant questions about reading scripts at the agency at which I work.  But I brought that on myself, I should have just said I'm an aspiring writer and that I'm between jobs.

Needless to say, I shunned that guy the rest of the night.

Back to work!

Read More

Memory Lane

STORYTIME

I asked my friend Spencer to share a story from his childhood on his blog (since he didn't have anything to write about). I promised to do the same. So here goes...

Once upon a summer...when I was a young buck. We're talking pre-teen age. I was spending the summer at my cousins Justin and James' house with my younger brother Zach.

While on this fantastical journey into imagination (stories will have to be shared at a later time), my brother and I slept on a futon mattress on the floor. Which so happened to be placed right next to my two cousins' bunk bed.

One night, in the middle of our slumber, my cousin Justin, who was sleeping on the top bunk, fell off and dropped down - his knee plummeting straight into the nads of my poor brother Zach. We're talking full on WWE knee thrust - right in the groin.

Without knowing what transpired, Justin woke up and climbed back into bed.

My brother - reeling from the pain - turned over to me (who was sound asleep) and told me that he was in severe pain. "My balls hurt!" He exclaimed, imploring me to make it better.

"Shut up, go to bed!" I grumbled back to him in my sleepy stupor.

Again he implored me - "Eric, it hurts real bad!"

"Go back to sleep!" I told him, not so kindly.

So he did just that. He went back to sleep. For the life of me I don't know how. He must have been in some terrible pain.

The next morning, when we knew better, we figured out what had happened. I tried to console my poor brother and apologize to him for treating him so negatively (I'm not that nice when I'm asleep, ask my wife).

Turns out, Justin got him good because he had a bruise on his groin and testies (his words, I didn't see 'em - cause that's gross).

Wherever you are right now Zach -- I'm sorry! I should have believed you and done something about it (an icepack?).

Read More

Someone Lost a Nickel (and Other Wild Stories) - Part II

And now the thrilling conclusion to the wild stories of our Disneyland trip:

Space Mountain - Ghost Galaxy
It's no secret that Space Mountain is one of the best rides at Disneyland (although Justin would probably disagree with me...)

We were especially enthused about it this time because it would feature the new additions for Halloween -- the Ghost Galaxy (ooooooooohhhh! *Ghost noises*).

This was one of the first rides of the day. And frankly, it sucked. No matter how enthusiastic we were for it:

Anticipation is always better than the real thing.

The first time we rode it just seemed to go really slowly. I was not afraid of anything ghostly and it failed to provide the experience that it promised.

How is that possible? This is one of the best rides there and it was non-eventful. I wasn't completely upset about it, but it was not a good opener to our day (which turned out to be quite traumatic anyway, i.e. the Previous Post).

After all the terrible luck we had with ahem...snacks and wet rides, we decided to try Space Mountain again. I mean we had Fast Passes, why not use them?

Quick Side Note: Did you know that you can use Fast Passes later than the time shown? It's true, it was confirmed by several employees. You can't cash them in earlier than the time shown, but if you happen to get soaked on a ride and are unable to make it to your time slot because you are buying new clothes and changing, you can just return to the ride and hand them the late ticket and it will be accepted. We did it like three times this trip because of certain setbacks...

Anyway, back to the story, we decided to ride it again. This time with Fast Passes. We flew to the front of the line and were able to get on the ride within minutes.

The second experience was in no way similar to the first. This ride was fast, freaky and fun. Tiffany pretty much closed her eyes and screamed the entire time. The ghostly parts were still a bit "whatever" but the ride itself was a vast improvement.

We were even stopped by a survey taker (with those cool little electronic surveys and the red uniforms), which I had been secretly hoping would happen ever since the first time we went to Disneyland last year. I was able to express my enthusiasm for the ride which left me content.

Someone Lost a Nickel
After riding Space Mountain for a second time and being more pleased with it this go around, we headed to another ride across the park to which we had a Fast Pass for.

We again flew through the line and made our way to the second line that led to the launch point.

Tiffany stopped. The thought came to me that she was hurt in some way. This was the opposite of the case. She bent down and picked something up. She spread it in her fingers to get a good look at it and then her eyes went wildly alert. She came quickly up to me and told me to put that something in my pocket. No questions asked, I stuffed it in. It felt like money.

Once we stopped at the back of the line Tiffany said she thought she saw a $100 symbol on one of the bills. I slyly pulled the bills out and counted. It was not a little bit.

This is not an accurate representation of the denomination,
but it is similar to the method of discovery.

What my dear wife had discovered on the ground was nothing other than a wad of cash.


We both began to smile from ear to ear. This was a great discovery. The first stages of emotion were of utter giddiness and joy for what had been found. We discussed briefly about its origins, but mostly we discussed what our course of action would be.

Tiffany was under the impression that we should try and find an employee to inquire about lost money. I was less enthusiastic about this idea, especially if the employee happened to be dishonest.

We decided to tweet/text the question to our friends and family. What would you do? You find a great deal of money on the ground with no one around to claim it. Do you -

Take it to a lost and found?
Keep it and count it a blessing?

We went ahead and rode our ride, hoping that our respective group would answer the question for us and make the decision for us. Go ahead, ask yourself these questions. You found some money, what do you do?

Now for what we decided to do --
We had checked our responses and talked with Tiffany's mom. The consensus was to just keep it, but there was a really strong minority that said to return it. This didn't help at all. It made it worse actually because the line became more and more blurred.

If it was just a few bucks or even less than $50 I would have no problem just keeping it. The owner most likely counted it a loss and has moved on. But this was more than that. Not a lot, but definitely enough to help us out in our low economic state.

After much deliberation and soul-tormenting, we decided that we would feel less guilty about ourselves if we just turned the money in. We were careful to whom we spoke to and to who we gave the money. This led us to the Disneyland Lost and Found (next to California Adventure on the left-hand side). We stood in line and waited our turn to file a claim.

While waiting in line Tiffany struck up a conversation with a woman waiting in line in front of us. She had lost her lanyard with not only her collected pins, but her family's tickets, their hotel room, and I think she mentioned some money. We instantly felt for the lady and her family. That is a truly terrible thing to have lost (or in her case, possibly stolen). We mentioned how sorry we were and that we hoped she would find it. She was grateful and continued on to fill out a lost claim.

The woman that handled our claim was very friendly indeed. She joked and laughed with us as we described the situation. She told us about some of the weirdest things that she had heard have been returned to their department (A glass eye was one of the wildest). She mentioned that a kid once found $1,400 on a money clip and had returned it. The owner believed the money to be lost and decided not to pursue it. A few weeks later, the man's girlfriend bugged him to go ahead and see if the money had been returned so they went to check. When the employee pulled out the money clip with all the money still there, the man fainted to the ground knocking his head against the pavement!

Once the claim was filed, the employee handed us a claim ticket along with four Ultimate Fast Passes to any ride in the park (good to get up to six people into a ride), she gave it to us for being honest. Hooray for Disney rewards!

Even though I wouldn't have felt completely bad about keeping the money, I'm glad we turned it in. Speaking to the woman in line at the Lost and Found was a very encouraging moment that helped me realize it was the right thing. My wife the ultimate in integrity was once again right in her decision to turn the money in. She has always been an example of honesty to me and I appreciate her for it.

BTW - if the money isn't claimed within 30 days we have 30 days ourselves return and claim it or it will be donated to charity, so maybe it is a happy ending after all!

Secret
Tiffany knows what this picture is about. It's a secret and it's between us. No fear though! I will make up a story for you to think is the real reason for this picture.
As we went to inquire about a lost and found we entered the City Hall. As we were walking in we saw none other than comedic legend Mitch Hedburg! How could this be? Hedburg is one of my all-time favorite comics and unfortunately he's been dead for several years! I guess there was a bit of ghostly magic at the park that day.

(Okay that wasn't true, but it did happen to us in downtown Hollywood the other day. We also saw Hulk Hogan driving a Scion from Wisconsin. It was a very surreal experience because it happened within a few seconds of each other).

Read More

Someone Lost a Nickel (and Other Wild Stories) - Part I

This weekend some very weird things happened. First off, Tiffany and I went to Disneyland.
That's not the weird part, but it was at Disneyland that these wild things happened. I will now entertain you all with tales of these most fateful exploits (in two parts):

Sugar Shock
There are times in your life when you do something completely stupid, and you know it's stupid, and you know it will not end in a good way, but you do it anyway. After spotting a particularly enticing cupcake with a giant dollop of frosting, I became obsessed in eating one.

This was a very bad idea. After going off sugar for a good month, then starting a 1500 calorie diet since then, my body is physically unable to process something with such a massive amount of both sugar and calories. I knew this before starting.

The Cupcake in Question

I did it anyway. I ate the whole thing. Pretty quickly too. Soon after (and we're talking within the next few minutes) my stomach started to feel absolutely terrible. It felt like the whole machine was rejecting the new oil and the gears were grinding.

We got into the Splash Mountain line (which is another story), and I continued to complain about my stomach - to which Tiffany replied that she didn't want to hear it anymore because I did it to myself.

The ride was terrible (for two reasons, the second is explained below). I felt awful the whole time. Once we were done I made a beeline for the nearest bathroom, which as it turns out is not too close. I became more and more impatient and enraged as my path to the restrooms became more and more crowded.

Fortunately for me (and everyone else) I made it in time to do my business.

Lessons learned: No one should eat that much sugar, no one. It is probably a good idea to go to the bathroom when needed and not wait. And finally, remember that those paper seat covers offered in most restrooms for sanitation purposes do in fact dissolve in water. Think about that when you try and use the toilet soaking wet (again, details below).


Wet Blanket
If there's one thing I have learned more than anything during this fateful trip, it's that you should always bring an extra pair of clothing when riding potentially soaking rides. You'd think like the cupcake, I'd know better. Well I didn't.

For some stupid reason, we were put in the Splash Mountain log-boat with four other very large adult men. The ride is designed for two parents and four kids (or less). Our combined weight wasn't enough to cause the ride to jam, but it did put pressure on the water level - forcing a great deal of it to come into our boat after slight falls.

We were completely head-to-toe soaked by the time we got to the first singing bunny. And that doesn't include that last drop into the brier patch.

I look like I'm having a good time, but really I'm not.

I was already not feeling very well on the ride and the soaking added insult. The final trip through the scenery to the unloading dock was particularly shameful and painful. It was out of a sad movie - the train came passing through and everyone stared, the people behind us were swearing and carrying on about the water, and the ride got backlogged (get it) and we had to wait to get out.

Needless to say, I wasn't in a happy place. After using the restroom (uh...see above), it was increasingly apparent that we were going to need to change.

We live about an hours drive away (without traffic) so I didn't want to go all the way back just to get new clothes. I was pretty sure we didn't have anything in the car. It didn't matter to me, I needed to change. I felt completely terrible. My shirt had become a heavy, wet, uncomfortable mess (a lot like a wet blanket) and I was being very irritable and cranky with Tiffany.

We decided to head back to the car to figure it out. On the way we passed by a Quicksilver store at Downtown Disney. We ducked in real quick to see what we could find. Awesomely, they had a sale going and we were able to find a new shirt and pair of shorts for me, a shirt for Tiffany and fresh socks for both of us (because our shoes were squeaking something awful).

Our Fresh Digs

With a fresh pair of clothes and a new desire for a great day, we headed back into the park. The new clothes (especially the shirt) made a world of difference. We were cheerful again. Able to conquer any new problems that may come our way (which they did...)

Untrusted Phone Call
This is more anecdotal than the others - but while waiting in line for Toy Story Mania (which is soooo good btw), Tiffany's brother Adam called. He didn't believe us when we told him where we were, so to preserve our reputation we took a photo of Tiffany's phone next to the California Screamin' ride and emailed it to him on my phone.

He didn't know what it was, but he believed us. Now he wants to come to Disneyland too. He's welcome anytime because we don't mind going again.

Can you believe me now?

More to come soon!

Read More

Two Bums, One Location

While grocery shopping at a particularly fancy Ralph's, my wife and I have been hit up for money on several occasions.

One particular time, we were begged upon by a man in pretty shoddy-looking clothes and hair. He asked us politely with a smile for some spare change. After we shook our heads no and walked on ahead, he emphatically stated "That's okay, I still love ya." Then he began singing.

I'm not sure if it was his cool demeanor or his pleasant voice, but both my wife and I felt we just needed to give him a little something.

Now, we're not affluent by any means. In fact we're pretty poor. But this was such a strong feeling of charity that filled us that we had to oblige. We busted out a few dollars and handed it to him as we drove out of the parking lot.

Flash forward. Several weeks later.

Same grocery store, about the same time of day, same situation. Although this time it was a pair of young skater dudes begging. Their story was that they needed like 60 cents to ride the bus home.

First off - they were on skateboards. I remember having to skateboard home a few miles because the only skate park was on the other end of town. Secondly, they asked so belligerently as to turn me off completely to their claim. I felt accosted. Not because they're young "hooligans" or that they looked dangerous or anything, it was just their tone. I've had a great deal of people in LA give me that tone - the "I'm-more-important-than-you-and-I-am-condescending" tone. I ain't havin' it. I never do.

Suffice it to say that those two kids did not get a couple of bucks, nor any spare change. Maybe next time they should try getting off their skateboards and asking nicely. Then I would consider sparing a few duckets.

(A nice song wouldn't hurt their cause either. Just sayin'...)

Read More

New Job! Er...Internship!

Yesterday was my first day of work at TVTracker.com!

I am the paid intern in the feature film department.

The day went pretty quickly. I was able to work on a bunch of information, updating the system and entering in domestic box-office and newly announced projects.

Everyone that works there is pretty chill and cool. There are a few dogs that hang out at work as well.

For lunch I went with a few co-workers to a place called Tomato Pie. I had the barbecue chicken pizza and a water (still no sugar).


We took our pizza slices back to work and ate them. The little chihuahua dog named "Mango" came right up to me and gave me the sad eyes. I did not relent (I was hungry too, and he had his own food).

Later, Mango brought us a roach motel that was in the kitchen. I stated "don't eat that!" and so he dropped it. Sam took it from him and put it away so he couldn't get it.

Aside from the terrible commute through Laurel Canyon, I am loving my hours and am very grateful to be working again, especially having a place to go every day.

Hooray for constant work!

Read More